December 4, 2013
by Trapper Tom, Ring Announcer/Wrestling Journalist
The Keystone State Wrestling Alliance (KSWA) Tag Team Championships are the most sought-after straps in the Commonwealth. No duo that wrestles in the organization passes up a shot to wear the straps. KSWA Owner Shawn Blanchard and the KSWA Championship Committee receive more inquiries about these trophies than any other. With that in mind, four teams will compete in a mini-tournament and get a prized opportunity for those belts all in the same night.
Party Gras—Lord Zoltan and Justin Sane—the organization’s most celebrated and successful team, will take on “Ice Man” Tony Johnson and Jay Flash, as well as The Mercenaries, and The Blood Beast and Kaida with Texas Tornado rules. That means that any competitor can tag in any other wrestler. This adds a definite attitude of instability, confusion and excitement.
Party Gras is ready to regain the title they had for 75 weeks. The Mercenaries—“Nasty” Nick Crane and Sniper—have believed all along that they are entitled to the belts. Flash has been singing about being the “New Tag Team Champions” for most of 2013, and the Blood Beast and Kaida may beat themselves to a pulp before ever making it to the ring.
Once a team wins the Tornado Match, they will get a shot later that same night with rested members of the VIPs—defending champions Tyler Cross and Edric Everhart. However, with Everhart being away from the KSWA for several weeks, the team may have some rust factor. Any way you look at it, the Tag Team division has never been more exciting.
The Five-Star Gauntlet Match will see champion Mitch Napier take on “The King” Del Douglas, Bobby Badfingers, J-Ru & Kris Kash. As many KSWA Krazies know, the Five-Star Championship was originally branded the Jr. Heavyweight Championship and a Gauntlet Match was held on December 4, 2010. Then called Drew Belanger and J.P. Goulet, the current day Tyler Cross and Edric Everhart wrestled in a single elimination marathon that also included Jay Flash, The Great Toyota, the Jester and eventual winner “Ice Man” Tony Johnson. The Gauntlet Match would become a FanFest staple. In 2011, Shane Starr would out-duel a field that included Johnson (who would lose, then regain the title during that span), Kris Kash, Del Douglas, “Diamond” Dave Diamond and The Jester. On May 5, 2012 Jonny Axx would defeat Starr, despite being well over the 200-lb. weight limit. Axx’s manager, Mayor Mystery, would have the title rebranded to the “5-Star Championship.” Four men: Johnson, Douglas, Starr and Axx would hold the Jr. Heavyweight belt.
On December 8, 2012 the first 5-Star Gauntlet Match was set for FanFest, despite constant caterwauling from Axx’s camp. Super Ginger, Jay Flash, The Blood Beast and Johnson would participate but Kris Kash would come out victorious. Napier would win the belt on August 17 in a Triple Threat match that included Kash and J-Ru.
Under former owner Bobby O, the KSWA 5-Star Championship was to be transformed into a title that recognizes technical prowess and the subtitles of wrestling, and not just pure brute force and power. From Axx to Napier, all of the 5-Star Champions have provided their own technical twist.
Now Bobby Badfingers has anointed himself to be the “Baddest Man in the KSWA.” To be objective, he may actually have a point. Over the course of his time in the KSWA, the fear of facing Bobby Badfingers has chased at least two Megastars to the sidelines. Twice now, two wrestlers immediately packed their bags and went from active roster to alumni, almost overnight. Badfingers relishes the distinction of being the wrestler megastars don’t want to face. He may be the only Megastar capable of matching power-for-power in the Gauntlet Match with Napier. No one can count out “The King” Del Douglas, J-Ru or Kris Kash. It will be the toughest, most daunting Gauntlet Match the KSWA has ever produced.
Long-time KSWA Megastar “Mr. Puniverse” Bob Atlas recently returned to the squared circle after a long injury-hiatus and the Krazies have been a buzz. Years ago, Atlas had his ribs injured in a match and it took him a lot longer than expected to return. But once he was cleared, he set his sights on old foes, namely the VIPs and “The Enforcer” Shawn Blanchard in particular. Since Atlas’ return, the Owner of the KSWA has been up to his eyebrows in Atlas. This decade-old grudge match continues on the sport’s biggest Keystone State stage.
And the 7-foot-tall, 365 lb. Jack Massacre has defied the odds and will be ready for 6’6”, 360 lb. Bulldozer. The Detroit Wrecking Machine sent a barrage of thugs after Massacre several months ago and sidelined the fan favorite. The Krazies have not heard much from the big man ever since. Meanwhile, Bulldozer has filmed interviews in which he has gloated over sidelining Massacre. Massacre has surprised doctors and will be back ready and able to go. More than 725 pounds will be in this match, arguably the hard-hitting escapade in KSWA history.
All of this and the inspirational and incredible Zach Gowen takes on the unorthodox Jester in a match between two talented wrestlers. Plus, “Luscious” Johnny Valiant returns to a Pittsburgh wrestling arena for the first time in more than 20 years.
KSWA FanFest/Toy Drive is this Saturday, December 7 at the Home of Professional Wrestling in Pittsburgh, the KSWA Arena. Bell time is 7:30. Tickets are $5 and fans are encouraged to bring a new toy for Allegheny County’s “Holiday Project.” Toys numbering in the thousands have been donated in recent years and this season will be no exception. Call 412-726-1762 for more information. Card is subject to change.