July 18, 2011
by Trapper Tom, Ring Announcer/Wrestling Journalist
The Keystone State Wrestling Alliance ventured onto its Krazy Tour 2011, just up the road from the KSWA Arena to Sharpsburg for the first-ever fundraiser for the Guyasuta Football and Cheerleading Association. Coming off of a huge KSWA Arena event, new KSWA World Champion Ali Kaida was ready to exert his dominance before the KSWA Krazies.
The evening started when Interim KSWA Kommissioner Gentleman Joe Perri made a few announcements. He said that Mayor Mystery was able to postpone Mitch Napier's rematch against Golden Triangle Champion Bobby Badfingers, that the KSWA has been scheduled to appear at the Plum Community Day event on July 30, and that this evening's match between Shawn Blanchard and Shane Starr would be a NO-DQ, no time limit, there must be a winner showdown.
KSWA World Title Match: Joey Quervo v. Ali Kaida
From the opening bell, it's all Ali Kaida with punches and kicks. Despite winning the KSWA title a week earlier, Ali Kaida is as angry as ever. A T-Bone suplex, then a traditional suplex. Kaida then digs at Joey's head, twisting it in unnatural positions. Then there's a pinch hold on Quervo's trapeziums muscles. Another T-Bone suplex, then the Camel Clutch. At 1:55, Joey Quervo taps out to the Camel Clutch. Post match: Referee Justin Smith attends to Joey as Ali Kaida takes the belt and heads to the back.
KSWA Jr. Heavyweight Title Match: The Jester v. Ice Man Tony Johnson
“King” Del Douglas accompanies The Jester to the ring. Then Tony Johnson is introduced. He slaps hands with fans then enters the ring, as nemesis Del Douglas tosses insults. The Jester cart wheels as the bell is rung. This perplexes The Ice Man. They lock up. The Jester tosses Ice Man to the mat and Del Douglas swats at Johnson's boot from the outside. They tie up again and this time the Jester is tossed aside and he falls outside. He's quickly back in and Johnson applies an arm bar. The Jester fights it off and the two trade maneuvers. Tony Johnson gets advantage after a failed arm bar in which Johnson flips right through it. Jester is soon back outside the ring and into Del's arms. He's back in for more Johnson offense. The Jester gains control and floors Johnson. He then kicks him and suplexes him in the center of the ring. Two count. Jester chokes to a four count. Then there's kicks to his back. Leg drop and a pin attempt. Two count. A reverse chin lock is applied. Johnson battles out but is floored by a double sledge. Two count. More chokes from the Jester. Jester argues with referee Jimmy James. Jester rides Johnson in the bottom rope. With referee James distracted Del uses the ropes on Johnson's throat. Front face lock on Johnson. Johnson battles out into the corner. Jester goes to the far corner and Johnson rushes in. Jester suplexes Johnson. Jester launches himself onto Johnson with the Jester bomb. Two count with Johnson's hand on the ropes. Jester attempts another bomb but misses. Johnson quickly rolls up Jester. Two count. Johnson is pushed outside onto the floor. Johnson on the apron, floors Jester. Johnson to the top rope and buries a knee into Jester. Both men are down. Johnson drapes an arm over Jester. Two and a half. Both men battle up and trade blows in the center of the ring. Johnson two, then three clothes lines. A side slam buries The Jester in the center of the ring. Johnson is up in the corner. Jester staggers to his feet. Johnson goes for his big boot. Jester catches his boot and Jester belly to back suplexes Johnson. Johnson battles back and kicks Jester in the mush. Three count. The winner and still Jr. Heavyweight Champ, Tony Johnson. Johnson celebrates. Douglas consoles the Jester.
Blood Beast and Bobby Badfingers v. Jay Flash and Mitch Napier
The Legion of the Apocalypse attack Jay and Mitch before the bell is rung. Referee Shawn Patrick calls for the bell. Napier and Flash recover and toss the opponents outside. Mitch and Flash then leap on their opponents on the hardwood floor outside. The Krazies go wild.
After a few moments, everyone enters the ring and Blood Beast starts on Mitch Napier. Jay Flash knocks on the Golden Triangle belt at ringside. Referee Patrick is distracted as Bad Blood attack Napier in their corner. Blood Beast slams Napier for a two count. Blood Beast buries his shin in Mitch's neck. Patrick breaks it up. Beast continues to pound on Napier. Then a huge clothesline. Blood Beast tags in the Golden Triangle Champion for a big leg drop. Patrick is distracted as the Legion attacks Mitch repeatedly in their corner. Mitch it hammered unmercifully but the huge duo. There's a whip into the corner then a big kick by Badfingers. Blood Beast is tagged in for a series of punches to the head. Mitch is leveled. Then a chop to Mitch's back. Patrick is distracted as Bobby Badfingers attacks Mitch on the outside. Mitch recovers momentarily then is leveled by Beast. Mitch fights off and tags Jay Flash. Flash is a house of fire on Beast in the ring and then he punches Badfingers outside. A flying body block puts Blood Beast down for two. Beast recovers and buries a shoulder in Flash. Then a bodyslam. Then a huge punch and falls Flash. Napier gets the fans chanting for Jay. There's a lazy two count that Mitch breaks up. Blood Beast distracts Patrick again as Badfingers assails Flash on the outside. There's a huge slam on Flash then a two count that Mitch again breaks up. It's all Blood Beast. Another slam and a two count that Mitch breaks up. With the ref distracted, Blood Beast buries a shot into Flash's privates. Soon all four men and in the ring. Badfingers is whipped into the corner. Flash splashes. The duo drops Blood Beast out. Napier Souix Falls slams Badfingers. Flash is the legal man. He goes to the top and splashes Badfingers. Flash pins Badfingers for the win! Post match, Badfingers is angry, as is Blood Beast. Flash and Napier celebrate in the ring.
Triple Threat: The King, Lou Martin and Kris Kash
All three men (five with the Jester at Douglas' side and Frank Durso seconding Martin) are introduced. It's established early that Douglas and Martin will work together. Durso attacks Kash on the outside. Douglas buries a knee in Kash and Martin bodyslams him in the center of the ring. Martin taunts the crowd. Douglas hits the fist from the middle that's banned in 49 out of 50 states. He goes for the pin but Martin breaks it up. Kash is tossed outside after Martin holds up Kash for a clothesline. Kash falls, Martin is clotheslined and Douglas takes some offense to the VIP member. Douglas battles back and applies a submission move to Douglas. He breaks it off to go after Kash. Kash is whipped into the corner and he flips out onto Martin. Kash chops Douglas hard. Three times. Kash buries his foot into Douglas. Martin is in the corner for the tilt a whirl drop kick. Durso is on the apron. He breaks up the pin attempt on Martin. Martin is outside. Douglas goes to pin Kash. Martin attacks the Jester on the outside. Douglas follows to the outside. Lou suplexes The King on the hardwood floor. Kash recovers and dives over the top rope onto Martin. All three men, Durso and Jester are on the outside. Durso buries fists into Kash. Kash is tossed inside. Martin drops the leg. Three count. Martin whips Kash into the corner. Buries a clothesline. Martin buries a boot into Kash as Douglas comes back in. Martin whips him in the corner. Buries the clothesline. Martin is the only Megastar standing. Martin tosses Douglas out to Durso. Kash recovers. Whips Martin into the ropes. Drop kick on Martin. Two count. Durso chokes Douglas at ringside. Kash prepares Martin for the swon ton from the top rope. He misses. Dr. Devastation gets Kash up for the Death Certificate. One, two, three for the win. Martin celebrates in the ring with Durso. The Jester consoles Douglas. Kash is laid out in the middle of the ring.
KSWA Tag Team Championship: Canadian Perfection v. Lord Zoltan & Justin Sane
Canadian Perfection hits the ring, then Justin Sane and Lord Zoltan. Zoltan and Sane pass out leis to the Krazies. Zoltan dances with the belt while on the apron. Zoltan, a native of New Orleans, Louisiana, gets the “USA” chant going. The crowd responds. Justin Sane starts with Drew Belanger. Belanger drops Sane with a drop toe hold. Sane gets up and drop toe holds Belanger. Sane gets Belanger in a wrist hold. Zoltan is tagged in. There's a wrist hold on Belanger. He twists it about a dozen times, while shouting “Yes.” He tags in Justin. Sane drapes Belanger's arm over the top rope and he falls to the floor. He gets back in, synchs it in again. Tags Zoltan. Arm bar on Belanger. Belanger balls up a fist to hit Zoltan. Jimmy James sees it, and Belanger is tossed to the mat. Goulet is irate that he saw Zoltan pull the tights. He does it again. Zoltan says he never pulls the tights. Justin is tagged back in. Belanger rolls up Justin for a surprise two count. Jimmy James accuses Sane of biting Belanger. Then he says Justin was on Belanger's eyes. Justin misses with a clothesline, Belanger slams him in the middle of the ring. Two count. The “USA” chants start again. At 5:14, Goulet is tagged in for the first time. The ref is distracted by Belanger as Goulet buries two dozen fists into Justin's skull. Two count on Justin. Goulet pulls Sane's arms back but Justin won't quit. He gets up but Goulet drops him for a two count. Goulet drives Sane into the Canadian's corner. They double team as Zoltan distracts James. Belanger is shadow tagged back in and Jimmy James believes it. Suplex and a two count on Justin. Belanger chokes Justin but breaks it before the five count. Repeatedly. Two count again on Justin. Justin crawls over and tags in Zoltan. Zoltan goes to kick Belanger in the midsection, but buries a knee just lower with the referee distracted. Zoltan goes to put a boot in again. Justin distracts the ref. Zoltan buries a boot. Tags are made and Justin is back in. He puts a head lock on Belanger in the middle of the ring. Belanger battles out and snap mares Justin. Belanger buries fists in Justin's forehead. Another two count. Justin is back in the Canadian's corner. They splash each other into Justin. Justin is prone in the corner. Goulet is tagged back in and he kicks Justin down. Two count. Justin is back in their corner. Belanger is tagged back in. He side suplexes Justin. Two count. Justin is back up. They both run the ropes and bury each other with a clothesline. Both Megastars reach their opponents. Zoltan double noggin knockers the Canadians. Zoltan buries 10 punches into Belanger's forehead and he falls outside. Justin does the same to Goulet. He falls in the center of the ring. Justin goes to the top rope and lands Shock Therapy on Goulet for the victory. The Canadians regroup while Zoltan and Sane celebrate in the center of the ring.
Main Event: Shawn Blanchard (with Durso) v. Shane Starr
This is a no-disqualification, no time limit match. Blanchard whips Starr into the ropes and buries a back elbow into Starr. Durso is still on the apron. The Megastars criss-cross the ropes. Starr bails out. Blanchard still runs until he realizes he's all alone. He is angry and kicks the bottom rope. Blanchard lures him in for a test of strength, then buries the boot. Shane Starr muscles out of it and buries Blanchard until his hands are on the mat. Starr steps on Blanchard's feet. After a few moments Blanchard gets back in and right into Starr's wrist lock. Blanchard breaks out of it. They revert back to their respective corners. Blanchard lurches forward and kicks Starr in the stomach. He then snap mares Starr to the mat. Then he digs and gouges at Starr. Referee Shawn Patrick talks with Frank Durso on the apron. Blanchard buries wrist tape into Starr's throat. He whips Starr into the ropes and drops him again. Blanchard puts Starr in the corner and buries boots. He goes to whip Starr in the corner, Starr reverses. Blanchard goes to the top rope then is thrown off. Starr gets offense and lands a standing suplex. Two count on Blanchard. Leg drop. One count on the VIP. Starr tosses him outside onto the hardwood. Blanchard is waiting with a right hand. Then a hard bodyslam on the outside. Durso puts the boots to Starr. Blanchard gets a chair and buries it into Starr. Blanchard takes him to the merchandise table and drives his head into the snack table. Blanchard grabs him and tosses him back into the ring. Blanchard goes for a pin but it's only two. Blanchard whips Starr into the ropes, Starr ducks a clothesline but Blanchard hits him with a boot. Blanchard headbutt from the middle rope. Two and a half count. Referee Shawn Patrick and Durso argue. Blanchard slaps Starr into a Sleeper Hold. Durso says “good night” from the outside. “Sleepy time in Sharpsburg,” he continues. Patrick goes for a count. The arm drops twice but not a third time. The fans stomp in approval. Starr buries his head into Blanchard's chin. Two clotheslines. Blanchard pulls Patrick in and his is splashed by Starr. Starr lands the Shining Starr. He goes for a pin. “Dr. Devastation” Lou Martin lands the Death Certificate on Starr and drapes Blanchard's arm over the dimmed Starr. He retreats and Kris Kash races from the locker room to blast him. Durso shakes Patrick for Blanchard's pin attempt. Starr gets his arm and shoulder up at two. Starr rolls up Blanchard. Two count by a groggy Patrick. Blanchard retreats in the corner. Punches a plenty from Starr. Blanchard pushes Starr out and onto the mat. He goes for the Figure Four. Shane Starr rolls him up for the one, two three and the victory! Post match: Durso tries to bully Patrick but he moves away from Patrick and with Blanchard. Kash comes out and celebrates with Starr. Blanchard gets the microphone and insults the crowd.
Thus ends the Guyasuta fundraising event in Sharpsburg.