Under the skies above the Spirit Hall parking lot in Pittsburgh, the Megastars of the Keystone State Wrestling Alliance (KSWA) celebrated its 250th event since the year 2000. Three of the organization’s titles were on the line, and each and every contest boasted big time appeal.

Triple Threat: Dennis Gregory (w/Mayor Mystery) v. Lucio Deveer v. Justin Sane

Mayor Mystery introduces 5-Star Champion Bubba the Bulldog, who accompanies himself and Gregory to the ring. Referee Adam Jugan is ready to call the action down the middle, as usual. A good portion of the crowd are in the corner of Deveer. The bell rings. Gregory distracts his opponents and he clobbers his opponents with right hands. Soon, Sane and Deveer work together and double clothesline Gregory down. They then double suplex him in the center of the ring. Deveer goes for the pin but Sane breaks it up. Deveer and Sane argue. Gregory nearly rolls Sane up for a pin. Gregory and Deveer brawl on the apron. Gregory attacks them both. Deveer picks up Gregory and administers a punch. Deveer tries to intimidate Gregory but that doesn’t work. He is punched down. Sane is sent to the outside. Gregory posts Deveer in the corner for a series of shoulders. Gregory kicks Sane on the outside. A “Mr. Monopoly” chant starts toward Mystery. Gregory has Deveer in a submission move. Mayor Mystery sprays an aerosol can worth of something in Deveer’s face. That does nothing and Deveer rolls up Denny for a near pin. Deveer delivers a back elbow and nearly gets a pin fall. Gregory rebounds. Sane is back in. He throws a bottle of Mayor Mystery’s mouth wash in Dennis’ face. Gregory drops Sane and nearly gets a pin fall. Deveer clotheslines Gregory and nearly gets a three count. Sane kicks Deveer. Sane DDT’s Deveer. The ref gets a two count before Deveer gets a shoulder up. The action continues. Sane and Deveer battle it out as Gregory is on the outside. There’s a sunset flip on Sane and he goes for the pin. Gregory races in and breaks it up. Gregory rolls up Deveer and they are in the ropes so that breaks the hold. Gregory hoists Sane and tosses him into Deveer. Gregory has Sane in the ropes for a submission move. Jugan says that Sane does not give up. Gregory tries to grab a ringside wrench. Gregory drops a leg on Deveer who was trying to get back into the ring. Sane is down in the center of the ring for a German Suplex. Mayor Mystery attacks Deveer on the outside. Sane is tossed into the corner Gregory splashes him. Deveer is on the apron where Mystery hits him with his cane. Gregory continues the assault on Sane. Deveer taunts Gregory and hits him in the gut. Deveer wants to suplex on the outside. Gregory lands on his feet! He pulls Deveer down and slams him on the apron. Justin climbs the corner and easily is caught by Gregory. He hits him with knee shots. Gregory slingshots Sane into the ropes and gets the win. 10:19

Jay Flash, Del Douglas and Jack Massacre (w/Mayor Mystery) v. Sly Scarpone, Big Country Matt McGraw and The Jester

Del Douglas is incensed before his opponents hit the ring. Mayor Mystery unsuccessfully tries the “Little Country” chant. The Krazies ask “Burger King” how he’s doing. Scarpone and Flash start out. Flash tries to hide behind referee Shawn Patrick. Flash and Scarpone lock up. Sly tosses Jay across the ring. Scarpone, wearing tights that read “Demolition Man” tosses Flash down again. Douglas charges that Sly pulled Flash’s flashy do. The two Megastars flex for the fans. Flash shouts at The Jester. They lock up again for a Test of Strength. Douglas shouts encouragement to Flash. Sly muscles Flash down with one hand and stomps on his hands. They run the ropes. Scarpone catches the 212-pound Flash and presses him over his head. Flash rebounds and tries to toss Sly over the top rope. He “Skins the Cat” and gets back in. He tags The Jester and tosses Flash onto Jester’s knees. The 7-foot-tall Jack Massacre is in. Big Country is tagged in. There’s a contingent that supports Massacre. The two big men line up and Massacre gets the upper hand with fists and forearms. Massacre hip tosses McGraw on his head. That’s enough to keep Massacre on top. Douglas is tagged in and he goes right after McGraw with whips and knees to the gut. Douglas swats at Scarpone before tagging in Flash who puts boots repeatedly onto McGraw. Douglas has McGraw’s boot on the rope. Mystery is on the outside for his usual beating. Flash rides McGraw into the corner. McGraw misses a clothesline but hits on the second attempt, dropping Flash. McGraw body slams him down. The Jester is in. They toss Flash down. Jester clotheslines a seated Flash. Two count. That was the first pin attempt of the match. Douglas is in and gets Jester in the corner, where Massacre and Flash attack. Douglas body slams Jester. He goes to the second rope for a fist that’s banned in 49 out of the 50 states. He gets a two count before Jester gets the shoulder up. Douglas has Jester in his corner for a series of punches. Jester is slammed by Douglas. Flash is tagged in and he jumps on Jester from the second rope. Two count. Flash gets Jester on the ground for a sleeper hold. The fans explode for Jester and he gets up. Flash drops him with a Samoan Drop. Flash has Jester in the ropes. Massacre hits a big clothesline on Jester. Douglas is in and has Jester in the corner. He hits Jester with a chop that was heard on Butler Street. Jester catches a sunset flip attempt and drops his buttocks on Douglas’ chest. Jester makes it to McGraw. Soon, all six men are in the ring. Massacre clobbers Scarpone and then sets his sites on McGraw. McGraw and Scarpone drop Massacre on the outside with a double clothesline. Flash superkicks Douglas on the outside. Scarpone 5-Fives Douglas. McGraw spears Flash. Jester goes up top for the Frog Splash and the pin. 13:20

Shawn Blanchard v. Mitch Napier

Two of the most successful former KSWA Heavyweight Champions of all time prepare. The Krazies call Blanchard a “sissy.” He threatens to leave. They shout louder than ever, but he is gets back in the ring. Blanchard gets Napier in a headlock. Blanchard drives him down with a shoulder block. That doesn’t make Napier happy. He bodyslams Blanchard down and to the asphalt. Blanchard holds his back and more importantly, breaks Napier’s momentum. Blanchard grabs a folding chair but Referee Jugan takes it off of him. Napier brings Blanchard in the hard way and immediately goes for the ankle lock. Blanchard gets to the ropes. He gets a two count on Blanchard. Napier continues with the offense. He wraps Blanchard’s leg over the bottom rope. The fans want Napier to “Break his leg.” Napier pulls him out of the corner. Napier hits a series of forearms, but Blanchard gets a fist into Napier’s ribs, breaking the hold. Blanchard flattens Napier with a big fist. Napier is hit with a German Suplex. Blanchard chops Napier down with a reverse knife edge chop. Blanchard puts the boots to Napier and tries for the Figure Four. Napier rolls him up and gets a near fall. Blanchard clotheslines Napier down. The fans chant in unison for Napier. Blanchard settles in for a standing suplex that lasts 20 seconds. He hits the mat. Napier gets a shoulder up. Blanchard gets a sleeper hold on Napier and then digs at his eyes and nose. Blanchard hits the Spinebuster but only gets two on the pin attempt. Napier is down and Blanchard appears to go for his own wrist tape. Blanchard wraps it around Napier’s throat but the ref can’t see it. Blanchard breaks the hold and Jugan looks for the illegal object. There’s an elbow to the top of Napier’s head. Blanchard measures for the next move. He hits a German Suplex and then another and a total of four. Napier grabs the ankle lock and makes Blanchard tap. 9:09

5-Star Championship: Yinza v. Bubba the Bulldog (champion) w/Mayor Mystery

Mayor Mystery and Bubba the Bulldog run down the excellent KSWA crowd. Referee Shawn Patrick calls for the bell. The two Megastars circle the ring. Bubba tries to stop the action before it even begins. The two lock up and Bubba gets Yinza down with an arm bar. Bubba goes after Yinza’s shoulder with a series of elbows. Mayor Mystery works on Yinza on the outside. The fans are not in Yinza’s corner. Bubba gets Yinza in a headlock. Yinza hip tosses him out and into the corner. Bubba is picked up and his head slammed into corner turnbuckles. Bubba does down. Yinza picks up Bubba and positions him for a series of punches to the head. Bubba falls down. Patrick counts to two before Bubba gets a shoulder up. Bubba hits Yinza low as the referee is distracted. Bubba goes for Yinza’s mask. Bubba flattens Yinza with a right hand. Then another. Bubba is in command. He shouts that he’s “The Best Wrestler in the world.” There’s a knee and leg drop. Yinza is up at two. The referee is distracted as Mayor Mystery goes to work on Yinza. Patrick looks over and sees the aftermath. He’s distracted again and Mayor Mystery goes after Yinza. Bubba tosses Yinza in the corner. He distracts Patrick and Mystery goes after Yinza. Bubba looks like he’s ready for a boot. Mystery hands Bubba a chain and the 5-Star champion uses it to choke Yinza. Yinza is whipped in the corner he sunset flips Bubba down and nearly gets a two count. Bubba tosses Yinza into two different ring posts. Yinza is rattled. Bubba clotheslines Yinza in the corner and hits the bulldog but only gets two. Bubba says, “It’s over!!” Bubba gets ready for another move but Yinza fights out and whips the 5-Star champion into the corner. Yinza hits the La Lucha splash off the ropes but only gets two. A snap mare and clothesline are next. The fans sense something big for Yinza. He climbs to the middle rope and hits a big elbow. Mayor Mystery breaks up the pin attempt. Yinza knocks Mystery from the apron. The two combatants fight and Bubba hits Yinza with the Rock Bottom and gets the win. 9:23.

Tommy Faime v. BROhemoth

The two jaw as the bell rings. They each run the ropes and try to gain an advantage over the other. BRO school boys Faime and nearly got the pin. The two exchange dirty looks. BROhemoth drops Faime with a clothesline and then a body slam. There’s an elbow on Faime and he gets up to drop a leg on Faime’s chest. Faime is slow getting up. BRO snap suplexes the KSWA Hall of Famer. BRO urges the fans to cheer for him and they do. He misses with a spear in the corner and hits the corner post hard. There’s a two count on BROhemoth. Faime wrings his arm back as BROhemoth is face-down on the mat. Faime continues the chain wrestling on the mat. He’s a smart move for the collegiate stand out. Faime slams BROhemoth in the corner and drops him with a clothesline. Both Megastars go to the outside. Faime slams BRO’s head on the apron. He keeps up the offense until BROhemoth blocks a punch. He uses the apron on Faime and then kicks him directly in the mush. The youngster tries for a clothesline in the corner but misses. Faime uses the steel to his advantage and tires out the big man. Faime pulls BROhemoth into the bottom ropes. A stunned BROhemoth rolls back in. Faime hip tosses him down. Faime slams BRO into the corner post. There’s a Samoan Drop on Faime out of nowhere. The fans cheer for BROhemoth. He lands a couple of clotheslines. Faime staggers. BRO splashes him and then spears him down in the center of the ring. BRO tries to catch his wind and get Faime gets him in a version of the Cobra Clutch and drops the big man down. BRO battles back. There’s a fist that knocks Faime down. There’s a kick to Faime’s sternum. Both men are down. Faime is the first to get up. He kicks and punches BROhemoth and drops an elbow. Faime gets him down to one knee. Faime lands a fist to the back of BROhemoth’s neck. BRO battles back. The two trade fisticuffs but BRO gets the upper hand. Faime kicks him in the gut. BRO World Strongest Slams Faime and gets the win. 9:37

KSWA Tag Team Championship: Team 12 Gauge v. Kris Kash and Shane Starr

Referee Shawn Patrick holds the most prestigious tag team titles in the Commonwealth high above the 325 KSWA Krazies. The bell rings and the two teams start shoving one another. They attempt to get both opponents into leg submission moves. The challengers bail to the outside. Once back inside, Morris and Starr begin the match. Morris, with help from Hunter, get Starr down. Morris gets Starr into a leg move and Hunter drops onto Starr. He chokes at Starr but breaks the hold before the five count. Hunter tags in Morris and he puts a knee to Starr’s forehead. Morris continues to pound away at Starr. The champion bounces back. Morris pulls Starr down from behind. Hunter is tagged in and he drops a double sledge from the middle rope. Hunter continues attacking Starr with the middle rope as Shawn Patrick is distracted by Kash in the opposing corner. The distraction goes on for a long while and Morris, as well as Marbell, continue to attack Starr at the ropes. Starr misses a double clothesline and tags in Kash, who races in and drops both opponents. Kash goes to the top but he is pushed down by Marbell. Hunter tosses Kash into the sky and drops him on the mat. Hunter grabs a hold with a Sleeper. Kash elbows his way out and clotheslines him down in the center of the ring. Morris is tagged in and the two Team 12 Gauge members double team for what appears to be an eternity. Hunter picks up Kash and spears him into Starr on the outside. Kash remains in and Hunter gets a two count before Kash gets a shoulder up. Hunter and Morris get Kash in the corner for plenty of pounding. Morris goes for the cover and gets two. Morris can’t believe it. Kash is under the bottom rope. Morris sling shots him off the bottom rope. Hunter and Marbell attack on the outside; Patrick is distracted by Starr and Morris. Morris misses with clotheslines. Kash runs the ropes repeatedly and the two connect with a double clothesline. Both men are down in the center of the ring. Starr shouts for Kash. He gets to tag Starr. He’s a house a fire, flattening both challengers with clotheslines. There’s a Sharpshooter on Hunter. Kash goes for a Figure Four leg lock on Morris but he kicks Kash into Starr. Team 12 Gauge goes to the outside, so does Kash and Starr. There’s a beating with all four Megastars. Kash climbs to the top of the school bus that serves as a drink establishment, onto his challengers. Kash and Starr bring Team 12 Gauge to the ring. They retaliate. Kash is dropped by both Megastars and Shane Starr makes the save of the night. Starr hits both challengers with a flying drop kick. Starr hits Hunter with the Shooting Star and gets the win. 12:00

Golden Triangle Championship: Lou Martin v. Anthony Alexander (champion)

On his way to the ring, Martin places his makeup mirror down and grabs the baby doll out of the hands of a young girl at ringside. He tears the head off of the doll and rockets the pieces into the sky. The Krazies are incensed. Special Guest Referee Bobby O raises the KSWA’s Golden Triangle Championship into the night air. It’s a brisk and refreshing 55 degrees as the bell rings. The two lock hands for a Test of Strength and Double-A easily gets him down and steps on Martin’s hands. Double A races on with the offense and body slams Martin down in the center of the ring. There’s a leg drop and Bobby O only gets one on the count. As steam emits from Double-A’s mouth, he drops Martin with a right hand. And then another. Martin says he’s okay to continue. There’s a back elbow that drops Martin. Martin crawls to the corner and Double-A picks him up. He slams Martin’s head into the turnbuckles and he drops hard back in the center of the ring. Alexander scoops Martin up and Fall Away Slams Martin onto the parking lot floor. The Krazies, shouting for “Garbage Pants” to get up, gets to his knees as Alexander gets to him. Alexander slams Martin’s head into the apron. Alexander peppers Martin with right hands. Bobby O looks to see what Martin is doing and he buries a thumb in Martin’s throat. Once back inside, Martin has the upper hand on Martin. After that beating, the veteran, Martin, kicks away at the Golden Triangle Champion. The fans chant for Alexander. Martin kicks Alexander in the back of the thigh. Bobby O asks if Double A gives and he doesn’t. Martin puts a knee in Alexander’s thigh. He then distracts the referee and buries a boot perhaps lower than Alexander’s midsection. Martin asks the crowd if he should continue. He does anyway. He puts the boots to Alexander’s leg. He continues to wisely work on that appendage. Martin pulls Alexander into the corner post. He slams Alexander’s legs across the ring post. Martin goes back in the ring as the chant of “Garbage Pants” escalates. Martin nearly wrecks into Bobby O as he works on the leg. Martin measures for well-placed shots on the back of Alexander’s knee. Martin goes to the middle rope. He lands a big elbow on Double-A. Alexander will not give up. Martin continues to slam knees into the back of Martin’s leg. Alexander will not give up. Martin clotheslines Martin down. Then there’s a boot to Alexander’s forehead. Alexander is draped over the middle rope. Martin dives onto Alexander. There’s a pin attempt that ends at two. Martin chokes at Double-A. Alexander rebounds and whips Martin into the ropes. He goes for a big boot but the injured leg makes him crumple to the mat. Martin sees the opening and kicks away. Martin then bites at Alexander’s head. Steam rises from Double-A’s cranium. Alexander goes for a desperation move—The Prime-Time Cancellation—but the leg gives out again. Alexander is able to muscle Martin in the corner. Double A plants a splash on Bobby O, who is pulled into the ring. Martin grabs a chair from ringside and plasters Alexander with it. There’s a Death Certificate on the chair. No Bobby O. He finally gets there and at two-and-three-quarters, Alexander miraculously gets a shoulder up. He goes for another Death Certificate. Out of nowhere, Alexander hits the Prime-Time Cancellation and gets the win. 13:47