“Special Attraction” Turns On Renegades, BROhemoth Goes Over Martin, Starr, Alexander Retain As KSWA Returns To West Deer
August 21, 2021
By Trapper Tom, Editor, KSWA Digest
The Keystone State Wrestling Alliance (KSWA) returned to JB’s Roadside Bar and Grill for the first time since the group returned to action in May. All of the championships were on the line, including the most coveted title in the Commonwealth, which is held by a local boy done good.
Five Star Championship: J-Ru (champion) v. “The Regent” Joshua Kavod
J-Ru comes to the ring to a hip-hop version of “I’m a Little Teapot, Short and Stout.” He complains that it isn’t his entrance music. The fans energetically embrace the music. Joshua Kavod is out next to challenge. J-Ru comes to the ring with a briefcase. Like last week, it contains the 5-Star Championship belt. He immediately tries to hit Kavod with the case. The challenger ducks it, and arm drags J-Ru. The champion falls to the outside. Once back inside, Kavod drops the champ and sends him into the corner. There’s a splash and a cross-body block for a two-count. J-Ru goes to the apron and is brought in the hard way. However, that offense is short-lived and J-Ru clotheslines the challenger and steps on his neck. He chokes some more with a well-placed shin. Patrick tells J-Ru that he can’t choke Kavod. J-Ru distracts by giving Patrick the Heimlich maneuver. J-Ru keeps the offense on Kavod. He drops The Regent and covers in a lazy fashion. Kavod twirls around J-Ru and drops him down in spectacular fashion. There’s a two count on J-Ru. Kavod keeps J-Ru on the ground and a split-legged moonsault for two. Both men are spent after great offense. J-Ru goes for his briefcase which holds the 5-Star Championship. The referee is distacted. J-Ru tosses the briefcase to Kavod and falls to the mat in a heap. Patrick turns around and believes the rouse and calls for the bell. J-Ru wins by disqualification. Kavod falls victim to an old trick. 6:22.
Tag Team Match: The Good Guys v. “The Ram” Anthony Drake and Gus the Gardner
The debuting Gus the Gardner and The Ram Anthony Drake follow the Good Guys to the ring. Zak Hunter wants to use a chain against the duo; however, as one might expect…that is illegal. Hunter locks up with Drake. The Appalachian has a bit of a power advantage over the Ram. Hunter is deceptively strong and the two seem to be at a deadlock. Hunter goes for the chain again and referee Jimmy James forces him to drop it. Gus the Gardner is in and clotheslines Hunter. He suplexes the tag team specialist. Brent Noctus is in and the two double team the newcomer. Noctus steps on Gus’ throat. Hunter is in and he chokes the Gardner. James sees the infraction and stops it. While the ref is distracted, Noctus drops a leg from the over-the-top rope. Hunter is back in and the two double team the Gardner. Noctus goes for a pin attempt and gets two. He goes again and the same thing happens. Hunter is in and pins Gus and gets two. Noctus and Hunter make quick tags and get another two-count. Noctus whips Hunter into Gus and then kicks him in the head. Two-count. Noctus picks up Gus and throws him into a corner. Gus gets a boot up on a splash attempt and then and elbow. Gus kicks and DDTs Noctus. A pin attempt ends at two. The fans are chanting for Gus as both Megastars are down. Gus crawls to his corner and the Ram is in. Ram goes after both Good Guys. The Good Guys head butt The Ram to no avail. Drake knocks their heads together and injects his own noggin into the equation. The Good Guys rally and Noctus has Ram in the corner and Hunter drops him onto the mat for the pin. 9:09
BROhemoth (w/Shawn Blanchard) v. Lou Martin
Shawn Blanchard accompanies BROhemoth to the ring and runs down the citizenry of West Deer. BROhemoth is in a foul mood. Lou Martin comes to the ring to a great reception from the crowd. Referee “The Count” Mark Charles III checks both combatants and the bell rings. Martin slaps BROhemoth in the caboose on three different occasions as the “luscious booty” is tagged. BRO is not happy with this development and he splashes Martin and adds a running clothesline for good measure. The Krazies chant “BRO, you suck!” Blanchard shouts that isn’t true. Inside the ring, BROhemoth keeps the heavy shots, including a head butt, coming. There’s a leg-drop on the Face of Pittsburgh. He lands a second at Blanchard’s calling. BRO chokes Martin as the chants start again. BROhemoth posts Martin up in the corner and lands a series of closed fists. Martin is tossed into the corner. BROhemoth hits a side-slam but only gets a two count. BRO is slow to get up as Martin is spent in the center of the ring. BROhemoth picks Martin up but he is able to fight out of any maneuver. Martin hits a DDT on BRO and he is down. At the count of six, both men get to their feet. Martin lands a series of punches as the ref is distracted by Blanchard. Martin hits his opponent with three clotheslines but gets nothing. There was a side slam in which Martin lands on BROhemoth’s knee. Martin tries to go for the Death Certificate but he is sunset flipped over. BRO misses a splash. Martin DDT’s BRO a second time. There’s a two-and-a-half count. BRO is on the second rope. Martin running splashes him in the ropes but only gets two. Blanchard shouts encouragement to BRO. Martin lands more right hands. Blanchard tries to trip Martin. Martin knocks Blanchard off the apron. BRO scoops Martin up into the F-5 for the win. 8:19. Post-Match: BROhemoth F-5’s Martin again. Blanchard taunts Martin and then slaps him in the face. No one comes to Martin’s aid. Blanchard raises BROhemoth’s hand in victory.
KSWA Tag Team Championship: Lucio Deveer and Malakai Gage v. The Renegades (champions)
“The Side Show Psycho” Malakai Gage and “The Pittsburgh Luchadore” Yinza lock up. Gage gets Yinza down and into a front-face headlock. Gage shoulder blocks Yinza down. “Big Country” Matt McGraw shouts encouragement from the apron. Gage goes for a couple of quick pins but they end at two. Gage arm-drags Yinza but he fights out of the offense. There’s a break in the action and the two combatants bump fists. McGraw is tagged in and so is “The Enigma” Lucio Deveer. Lucio cannot drop Deveer with clotheslines, but Country drops Deveer with a clothesline. McGraw goes to the outside and Deveer dives on him. McGraw is tossed back in but he gets some offense on Deveer. He’s whipped into the corner and there’s a side slam on Deveer for a two count. Deveer gets to Gage but he is met by McGraw. Big Country drives the Psycho into the corner. Yinza is tagged in. Yinza jumps off of McGraw’s back and onto Deveer. Two-count. Yinza German suplexes Gage with the “Three Rivers.” Yinza keeps the offense on Gage. Yinza gets him with a full nelson. Gage fights it off and hits a back breaker on Yinza. Deveer is in and he suplexes Yinza. The tag is made to Gage. He keeps the pressure on Yinza with a snap suplex. McGraw breaks up the pin attempt. Gage tags Deveer, who drops a leg on the fallen Yinza. Yinza hears chants from the Krazies. He powers out of a headlock but Deveer drops him down for a one-count. Gage is tagged in. Gage and Deveer put Yinza on the top rope. Yinza hits a flying cross body block on both competitors. Yinza crawls to the corner and tags in Big Country. He is in and levels both opponents. There’s a body slam on Gage and then Deveer. Country cleans house. Deveer is down and Yinza is launched on him by McGraw. Gage breaks up the count. A reverse back breaker on Yinza. McGraw drops Gage. Deveer hits McGraw with a double knee back breaker. McGraw recovers and picks up Gage. Yinza hits Gage with Pittsburgh Plunge for the victory. 12:13. Post-Match: all four Megastars celebrate together, and then all of the sudden, Lucio and Malakai attack the Renegades from behind! Deveer shouts that their team is now the “Special Attraction” and then they leave.
The Beastman v. “Mr. Thriller” Johnny Mercury
Mayor Mystery takes the microphone, and shouts that the duo have formed a partnership, “The Beastman” is now destined for KSWA Gold. The bell rings and the two combatants circle the ring. Beastman shoulder blocks the Youngstown, PA export down. Mercury calls for the fans to get in his corner and they do. They circle the ring and Beastman shoulder blocks Mercury. He stops Beastman from running the ropes. He distracts the big man and punches hi in the chin. Mercury is shoulder blocked down again. They run the ropes again. Mercury bails and Beastman continues to run the ropes. Mayor Mystery stops Beastman from running. Mercury is back in the ring. Mercury calls for a Test of Strength with Beastman but punches him instead. Mercury dodges some Beastman offense, but is leveled with a shoulder block. Mercury goes low and kicks Beastman in the knee. Beastman is in the ropes, Mercury calls for a 619 but Mayor Mystery trips him up. Beastman has Mercury in a corner for offense, punches, slaps and shoulders. Mayor Mystery shouts encouragement from the outside. Mercury is down. Beastman climbs to the second rope and Mercury runs off the ropes and is leveled by Beastman. There’s a thunderous side slam. There’s a two count. Beastman gets Mercury down and keeps the pressure on the youngster. Mercury breaks it up with elbows, but that’s not enough to drop the Beastman. A drop kick is delivered to Beastman’s head and he finally falls to the mat. Mercury is up. Beastman clubs Mercury. There’s an overhand chop. Mercury powers away on Beastman. There’s a leg scissors. Beastman is down in the ropes. Mercury hits the 619. Beastman is hit with a moonsault. Two-count. Both men are up. Beastman clotheslines Mercury but he gets a shoulder up at two and a half. Mercury fights out of a powerbomb. Beastman drops Mercury. Mercury kicks him in the back. Mercury goes for another 619 but Beastman blocks it. Explosively, Beastman hits the sit-down choke slam on Mercury for the victory. 10:38
Golden Triangle Championship: Del Douglas v. Shane Starr (champion)
Del Douglas comes to the ring with Shawn Blanchard. Shane Starr is clearly the fan favorite as the Krazies are louder than they have been all evening. The “Burger King” chant rings out in West Deer. The bell rings and the fans continue to get under Douglas’ skin. Del poses for the crowd, and gets no response. When the action starts, Douglas is very apprehensive. They start off with a test of strength, but “The King” backs off. Starr hip tosses and bodyslams his long-time rival. Douglas bails to the outside. The fans chant “Soft Serve” but Douglas argues that he is, in fact, “HARD ice cream.” Douglas levels the playing field by poking Starr in the eye. A Russian leg sweep and only a one-count. The fans chant “You’re So Weak” toward Starr. The Referee is distracted and Blanchard chokes Starr on the outside. Douglas keeps the offense on Starr. He clotheslines the Golden Triangle Champion down. There’s an elbow drop and two count. Douglas shouts “You’re Hero’s nothing!” Starr school boy rolls up Douglas for a two count. The chants are directed toward Douglas once again. He body slams Starr. Douglas slaps in the Royal Crab. Starr will not give up. He crawls to the ropes. The hold is broken up. Douglas goes for the move again, but Starr holds onto the ropes. He does get Starr down in the center of the ring. He gets to the ropes again. The hold is broken and Douglas is frustrated. He drops an elbow and gets a two count. Douglas punches away at Starr but he is able to rebound. He gets Douglas in the corner for shoulders. Douglas fights off Starr and lands the fist that’s “banned in 49 or the 50 states.” He lands it but doesn’t get the pin. Starr fights off the Sharpshooter by pulling Starr’s hair. Douglas shouts that he didn’t pull Starr’s hair. The referee is distracted and Starr is attacked by Blanchard. Douglas goes for a “Drop It Like It’s Hot” but misses. Starr clotheslines and back elbows Douglas down. Blanchard climbs to the apron. Starr fights him off. Douglas drops Starr in the “Drop It Like It’s Hot” but Starr kicks out. Douglas slaps Starr and calls him a “Dirty Filthy Hoe.” Starr grabs Douglas, applies a Side Slam and scores the victory. 12:25.
KSWA Heavyweight Championship: Harley T. Morris v. Anthony Alexander (champion)
Referee Shawn Patrick holds up the most coveted title in the Commonwealth before the Anthony-loving crowd. The bell rings and the two veterans circle the ring. The fans are clearly in Double A’s corner. Anthony grabs Morris in a headlock and asks the crowd if they want him to “pop his head off.” They love it. Double A body slams Morris and the Professional reels into the corner. Alexander punches Morris into the corner. He follows up with ten punches to the head. Morris then is hit with a boot. A two count follows. Morris hits Alexander with a questionable move and follows that up with a knee to the back of the head. Alexander is in the ropes and Morris uses the cords as a weapon. He snaps Alexander’s neck into the bottom rope and then chokes him. Alexander gets to his knees and the second rope. Morris dives on him and keeps the pressure going. Morris kicks Alexander in the head. Morris picks him up and Alexander swings away at Morris’ midsection. Morris gets Alexander down and keeps the offense up with boots. Morris climbed the corner post and Alexander jumped up to meet him there. Alexander superplexes Morris from the corner. Both megastars are down. Patrick counts to seven before both men get to their knees. They trade right hands. They get to their feet and Alexander whips Morris in the ropes, but The Professional stops. Alexander hits Morris with a Spinebuster. There’s a two count. Morris hits Alexander with fists and a neck breaker. At two and a half, Alexander kicks out. The fans chant for Double A again. Morris shouts in frustration. Morris calls for the pile driver. Alexander lands a Prime-Time Cancellation out of nowhere for the victory. 8:31
Post-Match. Douglas races to the ring with Blanchard in toe and attacks Alexander. The Champion fights back and hits a boot as Douglas bails to the outside and locker room.